Family & Relationships 7 Reasons Not to Wait Until After the Holidays to Break Up With Someone

20:23  20 december  2017
20:23  20 december  2017 Source:   SheKnows

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Should You Wait Until After The Holidays To Break Up With Your S.O.? Still, she explains, "it's silly and even a little bit cruel to stay with someone for longer than you should just because of the impending holidays .”

Yes, breaking up with someone just before or during the holiday season is extra hard for both of you, but trying to "spare their feelings" by waiting until afterward is just living a lie, says online dating coach Eric Resnick.

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The holiday season is one filled with lots of stress and emotion. A new year just around the corner may have you questioning your life decisions, one of which could be your relationship. If your partnership has been on a slow fizzle to nothing and you feel you want to end it but the holidays have you thinking about riding out the relationship until after the holidays, don't! We talked to the relationships experts about why it’s better to break up with someone before the holidays.

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Yes, breaking up with someone just before or during the holiday season is extra hard for both of you, but trying to "spare their feelings" by waiting until afterward is just living a lie, says online dating coach Eric Resnick.

1. You don’t have to fake it

“If your relationship is burning out and you know in you heart it is really over, why prolong it and fake happiness at another family gathering that you won't be a part of anymore?” asks Susan McCord, a dating and relationship columnist and relationship coach. Can you really picture yourself going to holiday party after holiday party with this person you no longer want to be with? If the thought of faking a happy relationship to the people around you makes you dread the holidays more, you need to end it now.

2. You’ll both be surrounded by family & friends

One upside to the preholiday breakup is that this time of the year, we’re all surrounded by family and friends. When either of you is feeling down about the breakup, at least you’ll both have people to lean on. “Yes, you'll look like the bad person. There's no way to avoid that. But you've been honest with yourself and with your mate. Honesty is essential for any relationship, even those that are terminating,” explains relationship expert Susan Winter.

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Though it's worth it to wait until you're 100 percent sure, you actually want to end the relationship— breaking up You might think you're saving someone heartache by sugarcoating your breakup , but by masking your real reasons , you risk leaving them confused, which impedes closure.

There are many reasons why you might want or need to break up on Valentine's Day; however, if timing is everything, then breaking up with If you need to, recall why you wanted to break up with the other person and why you needed to do it on Valentine’s Day (and couldn't wait until another day).

3. Living a lie will suck for both of you

Yes, breaking up with someone just before or during the holiday season is extra hard for both of you, but trying to "spare their feelings" by waiting until afterward is just living a lie, says online dating coach Eric Resnick. “You are tricking someone into thinking everything is OK when you know it isn't. It is cruel and unfair to that person. The breakup will hurt them, but knowing that you stayed with them waiting for the best time to break up with them will hurt them much more.”

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4. You don’t have to exchange gifts

Breakups are not easy anytime of year, but spending money on them or letting them spend a lot of money on gifts for you when you are ready to walk away is not good karma, says McCord. Try to end things as early as you can. Don't wait to do it on the actual holiday. This will also allow both of you to return any gifts you may have bought for each other or each other’s families.

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Going through a breakup during the holidays is never fun, and there's no one right answer as to whether it's better to get it over with beforehand or wait until the dust As unpleasant as a breakup is, celebrating meaningfully is hard to do with someone who you are ready to break up with , or who is

I would wait until he's back to break up . Just find some reasons to be mostly offline when you normally chat. Aside from normal hurt at the breakup , I was furious at the deception. I think we would have been friends after the breakup if it hadn't been for that.

5. It may appear as if you’re using the other person

“Keeping someone around just for the holidays is ultimately unhealthy because it's delaying the inevitable. And it could seem like you're using that person as a "prop," keeping them around solely as a companion for Christmas events, family gatherings and someone to look good with on social media,” says relationship expert, David Bennett. It may also seem like you're just using them to get a gift. As hard as it may be to dump someone during the holidays, if you know it's time, it's ultimately the solution with the most integrity.

6. You’re just leading the other person on if you don’t

Carrying on a relationship through the holiday season can give someone the impression that the relationship is more serious than it really is. “Many people break up during the holidays because relationships move toward becoming too serious,” says Isabel James, a matchmaker and relationship coach. “Holidays mean spending time with family, buying expensive gifts and introducing the person you are seeing to colleagues and family. If somebody is not ready to do this and wants to avoid the uncomfortable experience of leaving the other person out, end the relationship.” In the end, it’s better than leading them on.

7. You avoid the embarrassment

If you wait until after the holidays to break up with your partner, you put your partner and yourself in the position of having to go back and tell all the friends and family (who saw you together at holiday parties) they got dumped as soon as the presents were unwrapped, explains Resnick. It’s better to end it before the holidays so you’ll only have to do the explaining once.

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The holidays are coming which also means some inevitable weight gain is on its way. Our bodies and health versus the holiday treats create quite the uphill battle. It seems like you only have two choices when it comes to food and the holidays; one, you choose to just give up on being healthy and hope that you can lose the extra pounds as a part of your New Year’s resolution. The second mentality is you deprive yourself of all the treats (and joy of savoring fun holiday food traditions).However, neither way will leave you happy or satisfied this holiday season. The important thing to remember is balance.

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